50 Things Guys Need to Know
- Saying "I love you" immediately before, during, or following sex doesn't count.
- Real men drive stick shift.
- I will leave if you lie.
- You are cute in raglan-sleeved T-shirts (two-toned baseball undershirts).
- I'm convinced I'm pregnant and obsess about it for a minimum of 24 to 48 hours before my period, even when I have no rational reason to think so.
- I love it when you hug me from behind and whisper in my ear.
- "Fine" is never an appropriate response when I ask you how I look.
- Most of the time when I fantasize, it's about you.
- I'm terrified of becoming my mother, even though I admire her.
- I get turned on simply seeing that I have an e-mail from you.
- I expect you to call me.
- Only rock stars are allowed to wear leather pants.
- I'm scared of losing my independence.
- I'm more forgiving of you than I really should be.
- Oral sex is your get-out-of-the-doghouse-free card. Manolo Blahnik shoes also do the trick.
- You did something bad. I seem cool with it. I'm not. (See directly above.)
- If I'm not having sex with you, I'm...
Well, or they want to learn but I won't give up my car
Unless there's a compelling reason - like you were planning something incredibly special and I had the bad grace to appear at the wrong time.
I thought I knew what raglan was...but now I'm confused.
Most of the time.
That depends on the rock star, the pants, and the guy wearing them. Some guys I know look just delicious in them. You know who you are.
(1) Who? (2) Forget the shoes.
- ...having a fat day.
- ...not feeling "connected" to you.
- ...blackmailing you to get something I want.
Cancel the third one. Because, frankly, I'm not going to suffer through not getting laid just to make you suffer.
Correction: New Kids on the Block. With that picture of Joey in the hat with no top.
Unless I ask you to. And even then, try to do it as gently as possible.
Especially holding a baby. Especially if it's in no way related to you.
Because you are to me.
Correction: unless the discussion is extremely relevant to the topic at hand, or I ask a bout it first.
"I love you" is always a good way to buy time to decide what you're thinking.
Particularly lesbian porn.
And less-nice girls like more of it.
If you feel the need to delete the log, there's something wrong.
I understand the difference between IC and OOC.