I whisper your name (ayradyss) wrote,
I whisper your name
ayradyss

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So silent are you...

I went to a friend's wedding this weekend.  One of my med school classmates.  I caught up with all the others who were there, the group of sixteen that I spent two years with and never felt a part of.  I smiled and exchanged all the proper words.  I enjoy talking with A-who-is-on-a-Navy-scholarship and his wife who is so beautiful she almost hurts to look at, in that soft and touchable sort of beauty: skin the shade of cooling caramel, small and snubbed nose, even, natural smile that breaks light across a serious face, black hair that curls around and begs to be twirled in fingers.  I enjoy it because A and I have made peace with our vastly differeing viewpoints and we can exchange words with some interest in each others' lives.  I enjoy talking with tiny fragile L, so sweet, so genuinely nice.  And P was not there.  I did not expect her to be, not with a baby born at 26 weeks in July to fret over (I did not know until her baby was a month out of the womb), but it would have been nice to tell her that I found six programs to apply to.  When last I saw her she and J made noises of delight and envy over my Step 2 scores and then scolded me for only wanting to apply to two residency programs.  It's suicide!  And I promised her, at least five.
I hit "apply" last night and filled in credit card numbers.  As soon as I hear back from D&D the pediatricians, I will have all of my recommendation letters requested.  I hope that my Dean's Letter is getting done, I have not heard from my advisor who is two and a half hours from me.

It is six o'clock in the morning, O Best Beloved.  Tonight, Angel will go to fencing and I will take ecchikun with me to do a first-pass look at the kittens available from Animal Control for adoption.  We are looking for two.  Angel will come with us again tomorrow, and hopefully we will pick two out, bring them home a day or two after that.  Hopefully they will not get lost in our house.  Hopefully I have moved the poisonous plants to the closed room, but I imagine I will have to move all the plants to satisfy my peace of mind.
And now I start a family medicine month with an OB rotation, here at home. It is so wonderfully strange to wake up next to my Angel and know that in the grey pre-dawn, that I will come home to him at night.
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