I whisper your name (ayradyss) wrote,
I whisper your name

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Long-overdue quotage...

These are the quotes from the nearly-forgotten New Year's Eve party...as promised.

Unknown Armies
"Dude, do you want some lemonade?"

"Nobody stands between me and the kitchen."

"I knew you were born to play a woman."

"Stay away from my wife, whippersnapper!"

"No lemonade if you piss me off."

"We should find a phone."
"My cell phone has no reception."
"Next time, get Verizon."

"I thought the Old Country was Canada."

"Every man should have a good woman."
"No such thing."

"What you need is a good, screwed up, messed-up, gotta-cut-it-with-a-knife-later-'cuz-you-don't-know-what-the-fuck-you-did Girl Scout knot."

"I have to pee."
"Go where you are."
"Not on my kitchen floor."
"I have to pee..."

"I don't get it...You put the gun in your waistband, pointed at what you're protecting the most."

"Why do you want the razor for?"
"I like weapons!"

Z'wad's Game
"Think: 'fantasy meets COPS'."
"What'cha gonna do..."
"When the dragon comes for you?"

"I can't find my D20, I'm getting paranoid. Can I roll a paranoid check?"
"No. You don't have your D20."

"Yay for not being able to screw someone who's dead."

"They're half-zombies..."

"A beast-rider, huh?"

"And even I pass on you."

"It's liquid courage, without the liquid."

"Musical alcohol."

"If a corpse is all dead, and an undead creature is half-dead, and these zombies are only half-animated, then they're one-quarter alive."
"So, they're only mostly-dead?"

"Poke the dead body, yeah-huh."

"Blah, blah, blah, transformer."

"The tip of his helmet is covered with bits of rotting vegetation."
"She's a vegetarian, she did it!"

"I'm not sure if we're speaking Arkansas or Ebonics."

"So people like me..."
"Don't understand it either."

"Did..." (player grabs her sheet and looks at it) "...can I afford to say that?"

"Once an iron maiden gets used, is it still an iron maiden, or is it an iron madam?"
"Or an iron widow?"

"It appears you ran over Slimer."

"I'm stupid, and I'm a child, so I don't understand death."

"Dead like croquet?"

"Help, I'm dead in the woods here!"

"Illegal aliens of Heaven!"

"The air in her head has now been completely recycled."

"...only because he's an authority figure, not because I respect him."

"But if he doesn't have pockets, where does he keep his emergency Bible?"
"The same place he keeps the altar boys."

"Don't go to the shiny place, my child!"

"He's too drunk to know that he should be dead."

"Can I take a look at that stick?"

"You beat the stick, and it makes the one-eyed monster go away."

"The Lord blesses all things - including motorsports."

"You guys find yourselves in a bog."
"You make it sound like this is a new thing."

"You may now flail."

"What are the chances that I get laid tonight?"

"...because whenever you start having sex in a B-movie, that's when more monsters attack."

"We don't know what happened to them."
"Evidently,they died."

"Wow, I have a scary AC. I couldn't hit me."
"I could. If I were evil, I could hit me even better."

"I'm a Medium cleric. Well, actually, I'm a pretty poor cleric."
"I'll have two large clerics and a bard."

(On determining the depth of a well) "We'll find an evil creature, have 'em take a piss down it, and Detect Evil. Then we'll see how deep it is."

(Who's the body?) "Nobody we knew."
"You sick bastard."

"Looks like they got at least this far."
"Yeah, and cleaned up after themselves. No blood."
"Scrubbing Bubbles."

"You haven't happened to see an idol of unspeakable evil here, have you?"
"The only idol I know of is covered in butterflies and dragons and is holding a little flower."
"Wow...it's the idol of toking."

"And on the other side of the door formerly known as evil..."

"Do they have their shoes off? If they have their shoes off, it's an orgy!"

"There's enough evil toke-idol to go around."

"Let me guess, we ran into intelligent bugbears."
"They're more intelligent than she is."

"See, sharing is normally good, but when you share evil, it spreads..."
"Like chicken pox?"
"Yeah, only without the itching, the redness, or the sores."

"Are they evil?"
"They were Evil Stupid. Now they're just confused."

"One's dead, one's almost dead, one's slightly lessdead, one's unhurt, and two are on fire."

"There is an extremely gimpy one and a gimpy one in melee with you."

"I'm going to plug up one of the bugbears with these..."

(The players find their older siblings, now deceased...)
"I poke them with my rod of resurrection."
"It doesn't work. Remember, you have to want to come back."
"Sis, you bitch!"

"You're incredibly well-equipped for garbage collectors."
"You should see the repo men."

"Everclear, for those nights when you long for a dessicated corpse and an alcove."

"The way of goodness and light that does not involve being pummelled by scars."

Apples to Apples
"Chris is judging normal."

"Oh, Industrial Revolution. I saw 'Dance Dance'."

"Don't forget my having an orgasm."A

"You would rather have a chimpanzee than Sean Connery."

"I have a poster of Carl Sagan..."
"Yeah,it's a pinup."
"You know, in chaps."

"Jesus isn't in the deck either."

"I win the most-random-card award..."

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