No, I'm serious. Either don't do it at all or clearly mark the bathroom that is so afflicted: Warning: In probability of extended seating on this toilet, ass may go numb. Because either I ate something that is acting as an incredibly potent osmotic agent, I've picked up some kind of bug, or my colonic absorptive system is on strike. I feel fine, despite my earlier incredible bitchiness (Thanks to everyone who expressed concern. I'm healed now.), except that I'm afraid to leave the bathroom for long. Hence the discovery that the air vent, even when closed, vents up the wall and into the toilet bowl. Hurrah.
Took a walk tonight. Watched five streetlights go out as I passed them, going around the bloack. Remembered Chuck, convinced that making streetlamps go out was my mutant power. Feeling much better, the brief paranoia faded quickly.
And Morrowind. Mmmm, Morrowind.