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New and improved! Quotes for all... - Nobody wears a white coat any more...
...a tribute to becoming a doctor.
ayradyss
ayradyss
New and improved! Quotes for all...
  • Me: Three bints and something on a dog show up.
    Jefe: All I can think is 'What? Lesbian circus?"

  • Jefe: He has a ponytail of bright copper hair down his back.
    Phloxin: What colour is the rest of his hair?
    Jefe (bewilderedly): Bright copper.
    Me: No, it is not an extension.
    Phloxin: Girl, ju need to take thet back to Kay-Mart!

  • Jefe: My robes had a colour, but you took that away.

  • Phloxin: I say something smarmy and unpleasant under my breath.

  • Me: Do you know what the paediatric dose of a magic mushroom is?
    Angel: One. Haven't you ever played Mario?

  • Lily: Do you know anything that would help them? (Them being a bunch of plague-ridden children)
    Angel: I pull out a handful of mushrooms. "Help them how?"

  • Me: You find nothing suspicious.
    Angel: Except the party.

  • Phloxin: Several dogs with crossbows just shot the hell out of me.
    Angel: Don't look at me. I haven't spiked her water in days.

  • Angel: And we have frozen phalluses.

  • Me: So we have Suné backed into a corner in terror.
    Eric: More like a groundhog.
    James (excitedly): I can speak with burrowing animals!

  • James: Somebody put sand in my cum!

  • Phloxin (flipping through a second-edition Monstrous): I forgot how cute their elemental pictures were. "Look at me, look at me! Grr!

  • Jefe: Kobold...looks like Splinter gone wrong.

  • Jefe: Splinter's like a level-18 nink-muncher...err...ninkja...fuck!
    Lily: Ninja-fuck?
    Phloxin (in a Splinter voice): You make a funny! Ha! Ha!

  • Me: What actually happened?
    Jefe: I think the gnome has just been flunk.
    Phloxin (excitedly): Gnome Flinger!

  • Jefe: The monk will not evade. I attempt to catch the gnome.

  • Jefe: When you're sitting there with the rope, looking like you're going to whack off or something...
    Phloxin: Floss?!?

  • Phloxin: I relate this in my own way...we play Charades.
    Me: Sounds like...cunt.
    Phloxin: Sydane! Sydane!
    Angel: You want to go back in the hole, don't you?

  • Phloxin: Mind flayer...looks like something from a Shriners convention.
    Angel: Augh, Shriners with tentacles! It's a hentai Shriner...
    Phloxin: I knew there was something wrong with them.

  • Angel: I roll a bong into the room, wait an hour, and then throw one pack of Pop-Tarts just in front of the door.

  • Me: I crit Bri. (rolling) Two damage.
    Angel: He critted you in the kneecap.
    Lily: Ow.

  • Me: Eric is the second letter of Jeff's name, so he doesn't get a turn.

  • Angel: You've been shot, fallen down the hole, and generally beaten up on.
    Phloxin: And now I've been infected with some bloody disease, but we don't know that yet.
    Lily: You're Rasputin!

  • Jefe: A little lesbian moment.

  • Me: Specially made for prisons: gnome on a rope.

  • Jefe: I will give them a confused, reassuring smile.

  • Me: Your sister's on the ground again. A zombie slammed her.
    Angel: I didn't think she was that desperate.

  • Angel: What's back there?
    Me: Oh, some dire weasels, some rats...
    Phloxin: Eww, they're not buggering the weasels again...
    I suppose this one makes more sense if you were there for the one-night RP where I actually did run the party into a group of drunken kobolds buggering giant weasels. It's sort of been a theme now.

  • Jefe (On Phloxin throwing a book at him): Ow!
    Phloxin: I'm sorry!
    Jefe: That's OK. You didn't know I had an ingrown toe (A long pause ensues) nail.
    Me: Jeff has a vagina on his foot!
    Jefe: Foot Fetish!

  • Me: Does anyone remember what I named the lord of this town?
    Everyone: Slut, Whore, Pimp . .etc.
    Phloxin: I'm sure it was something gay.
    Me: No, that was the lord of the other town!

  • Angel: What is the Spanish plague?
    Phloxin: Charro!

  • Bri (swallowing and holding up a finger): Okay, now you can say something funny.

  • Phloxin (singing): My beholder has a first name...it's R-A-L-P-H...
    Me (singing): My beholder has a second name...it's N-A-D-E-R...

  • Me (much later, singing) My beholder . . Dang it!

now feeling:: crazy crazy

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