- David: Is it moving?
GM: It is now. Roll me init.
- Jefe: I start singing inspiring battle hymns.
General chorus of "Indiana Jones" theme.
- Jefe: So if it's slowed, does that mean I get attacks of opportunity?
GM: No, that just means it's poky.
- Me: I'm not on crack any more, because crack fucks me up.
- Me: I take the corpse's foreskin.
David: I reincarnate it.
Angel: You can't. It's Jewish now.
Much later, on reading of quotes, David: I get it.
- David: What is it with you and doors?
- Me: I'm making myself so interesting to the DM that he'll keep me alive just to see what the fuck I'll do next.
Angel: In the meantime, you're really scaring the other drow.
- David: Since when do lizards have boobs?
- Angel: 11.
Jefe: I have to make a save, what?
- David: I am my own scroll of change self.
- Angel: I cast Mordenkainene's Card Catalog.
- Angel: Someone enlighten the daft man.
- GM (ah, the wonders of pre-genned random dungeons): That I wouldn't bother going down because - oh, my god, what the fuck? Okay, there's no door there.
- Me: We walk along in the glorious anticipation of a door.
- GM: You see an alcove.
Angel: A senile cove? (Read it out loud, it makes sense.)
- GM: And you take the door.
Me: Right there, in the hallway, we take the door.
Jefe: Full Metal Jacket.
- Bri: No, no, wait. Let me guess. We see another door.
- Jefe: And I will do some damage to it, which I will proceed to relate to you as soon as I find a bloody freakin' 8-sided die.
- David: I didn't think it (the builder) can just gatling-gun you with its eyes.
Angel (to me): Can you hand me that gatling - errh, cushion - by your knees?
- Bri: (sneezes)
David: You heard me.
Me: Gawoomba! It's Aboriginal for "is that mucus on your fingers?"
- David (singing): Q is for quickie, that's good enough for me...
- Angel: I is not real! I is not real!
- Me: Have you ever rubbed a beholder on your hair -
GM: - and stuck it to the wall?
- Me: Holy shit, we're on our second round of combat?
Angel: What, did you quadruple the hit points?
- David: I want a staff I can do damage with instead of turning it into a tree.
Angel: Stick it up its ass, then turn it into a tree.
James: Ow! Splinter!
Leftover quote pie...
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