- James: You could tie the drow to a rope and have them all levitate, and pull them along.
Angel: And then I could swing the rope!
Jefe: Drow on a rope? Is that like soap on a rope?
Me: Just...don't drop your drow in the shower.
- James: I'm sorry...did I just piss in your straw?
- GM: You know, she was in that one movie...with what's-is-face? (beat) Oh, could I be more vague? (Long pause) Good Will Hunting?
Jefe: There was a woman in Good Will Hunting?
GM: Besides Ben Affleck? Yes.
- Angel: If you displace yourself, and look to the left, do you see yourself?
- GM: If a displacer beast displaces itself, could it lick its own ass?
- Me: I've just discovered the secret to fixing earrings! If you wait long enough, they go out of vogue...
- Me: And then Mom TP'd...
Me: Yeah, Mom's playing D&D with Chicken on.
- GM: And the unborn child, which, for its sake, had better be born a girl.
Jefe: Ewww, it's got a penis, kill it.
Lily: It has extra parts. Can I send it back?
- Jefe: We found out Sekkyro' has a little bit of a gay streak...
Me: Sekkyro' is NOT GAY!
Lily: Is someone in denial?
- Jefe (reading the PHB): Holy God!
- GM: And sometime during the night, a fog rolls in. And you (pointing at Lily) see little lights off in the distance.
Me: They're calling your name.
Angel (mock-passion): Oh, yes! Ohhh, yes!
Me: A little pink light, and a little blue light...and two little purple lights off in the corner together...
GM: (stares helplessly, then bangs head on door)
- GM: ...Two points of damage.
Angel: Ow. I proceed to beat the shit out of it. Is there a pencil?
- GM: You attack the wight.
Angel: But it's black.
GM: It's easy to see. Because it's a wight, and it's black out.
Angel: I'm just going to attack it.
- GM: You send the lackeys out instead of going yourself? How noble.
Jefe (Casually): I have to watch the drow.
GM: The drow could beat the shit out of you.
Jefe: I could scare the shit out of them.
Lily: Michael Flatley?
Jefe: Michael Flatley. I have Permanent Image now.
- GM (triumphantly): It's not...re-dead, yet!
- GM: While you weren't looking, one of the little lights floated up to you and went 'ZOT!'
- Me: 18 damage to the wight.
Angel: How much to the wong?
- GM: But it's 10 points in a different way, because this was 6 and 4 and the last was 5 and 5.
Angel: Oooh, it stings...slightly differently.
- GM: You get five wight ears. One's a bit yellow.
Angel: And one wong.
Me: Three wight, one wong, one yellow?
Angel: No, the wong one was yellow...
- GM: Morning breaks.
Angel: Good. It stays dark.
GM: You head on your way.
Me: Oh. Head on your way. For some reason, I heard "Hit on your wang," and I was like "no, he doesn't do that either."
GM: No...no wang-hitting!
- Jefe: My wang is prehensile.
- Angel: Is it tattooed too?
Me: Yeah, with two serpents.
GM: It's pierced.
Me: Little chains for the tongues.
Bri (cringing): The sun elf climbs a tree. And stays very far away from him.
- GM: Conveniently at dusk, you reach whats-is-twat's castle.
Me: Keep going. It's too convenient to not be a trap.
Someone: He has a twat?
- GM: You can attack at night, or wait until morning.
Me: Morning! No, wait, I'm drow. Night.
- GM: He's sitting in the throne room, all enthroned...reading the paper.
Angel: Reading the paper?
GM: He's on the throne...
Me: I'm not writing that one down.
- GM: I like Mage Hand.
Angel: Who doesn't?
- GM: I'll provide breakfast for you...
Me: Hash browns?
GM: Of course
Lily (under her breath): Scattered, smothered, covered...
- Jefe: You know, you can't really cast a spell subtly as a bard...
GM: No, you can't....
Me (singing and strumming a fake guitar): I'm not casting a spell....I'm just singing...about the fireball that might coincidentally come out of nowhere...
GM (mimicking): Wouldn't that be funny...ha, ha, ha, ha....
Continue, until we're all on the floor, laughing:
GM: You find me scary...boo, boo, boo!
Me: Grr, hiss!
Angel (rolling dice): I critically threaten myself.
- Angel: We move the immovable rods.
GM: Only because you pushed the button.
- Me: So, wait. It's hallway-hallway-hallway-oops?
- Jefe: I have rope. I have rope knowledge.
Me: The bard knows rope.
- So. You have two fifty-foot lengths of rope, five immovable rods, and a 200-foot shaft, straight up, with reversed gravity on it. How do you get to the top? Or is it the bottom?
- GM: Weren't you like from the 44th noble house or something?
Me: Yeah, but we live out in the boondocks.
Jefe: So you're like redneck drow...
James: Trailer-trash drow.
Angel: I would so hate to walk in on that Jerry Springer show.
- GM: You have two corpses.
James: I animate them.
GM: Okay, you have two small zombie electrical...no, they're just little zombie lizards (mimes) Grrowr....grrrrowr.
- Jefe: Healing circle. The bard got you into a little circle and led you all in a rousing chorus of Kum-ba-yah. And now you feel better.
- GM: No, the pebble falls up, to the ceiling. Which is the floor of the shaft. You've got something crawling on your boobs. (It was a bug.)
- Angel: Do I recognise her?
GM: Have you seen a picture of the goddess?
Me: Actually, she has the collectible cards. Swimsuit edition.
- Angel: I say something in Celestial that probably isn't said very often in Celestial.
James: You just lost your cleric levels.
- Me: It's part of being a girl. We bitch about things to each other.
Jefe: I need someone to bitch at.
Me: Guys don't get bitch-buddies.
Jefe: No, we have fuck-buddies who get us in trouble.
- James: I suppose it would be a bad idea to kill the high priestess of a goddess right in front of her?
GM: Um, yes. Bad idea to try.
Jefe: The wight turns black? Or red?
GM: Black and blue...</li>