I whisper your name (ayradyss) wrote,
I whisper your name

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Quotes for tonight: 09 May

  • James: You could tie the drow to a rope and have them all levitate, and pull them along.
    Angel: And then I could swing the rope!
    Jefe: Drow on a rope? Is that like soap on a rope?
    Me: Just...don't drop your drow in the shower.

  • James: I'm sorry...did I just piss in your straw?

  • GM: You know, she was in that one movie...with what's-is-face? (beat) Oh, could I be more vague? (Long pause) Good Will Hunting?
    Jefe: There was a woman in Good Will Hunting?
    GM: Besides Ben Affleck? Yes.

  • Angel: If you displace yourself, and look to the left, do you see yourself?

  • GM: If a displacer beast displaces itself, could it lick its own ass?

  • Me: I've just discovered the secret to fixing earrings! If you wait long enough, they go out of vogue...

  • Me: And then Mom TP'd...
    Angel: TP'd?
    Me: Yeah, Mom's playing D&D with Chicken on.

  • GM: And the unborn child, which, for its sake, had better be born a girl.
    Jefe: Ewww, it's got a penis, kill it.
    Lily: It has extra parts. Can I send it back?

  • Jefe: We found out Sekkyro' has a little bit of a gay streak...
    Me: Sekkyro' is NOT GAY!
    Lily: Is someone in denial?

  • Jefe (reading the PHB): Holy God!
    Angel: Usually.

  • GM: And sometime during the night, a fog rolls in. And you (pointing at Lily) see little lights off in the distance.
    Me: They're calling your name.
    Angel (mock-passion): Oh, yes! Ohhh, yes!
    Me: A little pink light, and a little blue light...and two little purple lights off in the corner together...
    GM: (stares helplessly, then bangs head on door)

  • GM: ...Two points of damage.
    Angel: Ow. I proceed to beat the shit out of it. Is there a pencil?

  • GM: You attack the wight.
    Angel: But it's black.
    GM: It's easy to see. Because it's a wight, and it's black out.
    Angel: I'm just going to attack it.

  • GM: You send the lackeys out instead of going yourself? How noble.
    Jefe (Casually): I have to watch the drow.
    GM: The drow could beat the shit out of you.
    Jefe: I could scare the shit out of them.
    Lily: Michael Flatley?
    Jefe: Michael Flatley. I have Permanent Image now.

  • GM (triumphantly): It's not...re-dead, yet!

  • GM: While you weren't looking, one of the little lights floated up to you and went 'ZOT!'
    Me: Little-light-little-light-little-light-AIEE!

  • Me: 18 damage to the wight.
    Angel: How much to the wong?

  • Jefe: The wight turns black? Or red?
    GM: Black and blue...</li>
  • GM: But it's 10 points in a different way, because this was 6 and 4 and the last was 5 and 5.
    Angel: Oooh, it stings...slightly differently.

  • GM: You get five wight ears. One's a bit yellow.
    Angel: And one wong.
    Me: Three wight, one wong, one yellow?
    Angel: No, the wong one was yellow...

  • GM: Morning breaks.
    Angel: Good. It stays dark.
    GM: You head on your way.
    Me: Oh. Head on your way. For some reason, I heard "Hit on your wang," and I was like "no, he doesn't do that either."
    GM: No...no wang-hitting!

  • Jefe: My wang is prehensile.

  • Angel: Is it tattooed too?
    Me: Yeah, with two serpents.
    GM: It's pierced.
    Me: Little chains for the tongues.
    Bri (cringing): The sun elf climbs a tree. And stays very far away from him.

  • GM: Conveniently at dusk, you reach whats-is-twat's castle.
    Me: Keep going. It's too convenient to not be a trap.
    Someone: He has a twat?

  • GM: You can attack at night, or wait until morning.
    Me: Morning! No, wait, I'm drow. Night.

  • GM: He's sitting in the throne room, all enthroned...reading the paper.
    Angel: Reading the paper?
    GM: He's on the throne...
    Me: I'm not writing that one down.

  • GM: I like Mage Hand.
    Angel: Who doesn't?

  • GM: I'll provide breakfast for you...
    Me: Hash browns?
    GM: Of course
    Lily (under her breath): Scattered, smothered, covered...

  • Jefe: You know, you can't really cast a spell subtly as a bard...
    GM: No, you can't....
    Me (singing and strumming a fake guitar): I'm not casting a spell....I'm just singing...about the fireball that might coincidentally come out of nowhere...
    GM (mimicking): Wouldn't that be funny...ha, ha, ha, ha....
    Continue, until we're all on the floor, laughing:
    GM: You find me scary...boo, boo, boo!
    Me: Grr, hiss!
    Angel (rolling dice): I critically threaten myself.

  • Angel: We move the immovable rods.
    GM: Only because you pushed the button.

  • Me: So, wait. It's hallway-hallway-hallway-oops?

  • Jefe: I have rope. I have rope knowledge.
    Me: The bard knows rope.

  • So. You have two fifty-foot lengths of rope, five immovable rods, and a 200-foot shaft, straight up, with reversed gravity on it. How do you get to the top? Or is it the bottom?

  • GM: Weren't you like from the 44th noble house or something?
    Me: Yeah, but we live out in the boondocks.
    Jefe: So you're like redneck drow...
    James: Trailer-trash drow.
    Angel: I would so hate to walk in on that Jerry Springer show.

  • GM: You have two corpses.
    James: I animate them.
    GM: Okay, you have two small zombie electrical...no, they're just little zombie lizards (mimes) Grrowr....grrrrowr.

  • Jefe: Healing circle. The bard got you into a little circle and led you all in a rousing chorus of Kum-ba-yah. And now you feel better.

  • GM: No, the pebble falls up, to the ceiling. Which is the floor of the shaft. You've got something crawling on your boobs. (It was a bug.)

  • Angel: Do I recognise her?
    GM: Have you seen a picture of the goddess?
    Me: Actually, she has the collectible cards. Swimsuit edition.

  • Angel: I say something in Celestial that probably isn't said very often in Celestial.
    James: You just lost your cleric levels.

  • Me: It's part of being a girl. We bitch about things to each other.
    Jefe: I need someone to bitch at.
    Me: Guys don't get bitch-buddies.
    Jefe: No, we have fuck-buddies who get us in trouble.

  • James: I suppose it would be a bad idea to kill the high priestess of a goddess right in front of her?
    GM: Um, yes. Bad idea to try.
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